Handmade Flowers

Hey guys, my fren makes handmade flowers and i think she's real good at them. i'm a poor little single boy so i dun have AS MUCH use for it as most attached people.

Feb 14th is coming. maybe u guys wanna take some time to jus look thru the website. it's one page, very simple and straight forward..

Claire's handmade flowers

do me and my fren a favour la. jus click it and let me know if u're interested. i'll pass ur order to her. or u can email her direct. :)
thanks!!!

BAYFGM 09

Today was quite good... we had our BAYFGM. We really were lookin forward to this event coz the exco had planned up a short little skit that would take us through the previous 6 months. :) It was cute and fun to act along and so we were hoping that not only would the YFers walk with us thru the last 6 months but also be highly entertained by what we presented. I personally was looking forward to how many parents would come and this year didn't disappoint either. we had roughly about 8-10 parents there today... a huge encouragement to me since most of them were not the normal ones we see all the time at AGMs or Elections. :)

Yup, i must say that M.Chan was really nervous about the whole AGM, and even yesterday during the dry run, she was still not sure of what to say and how to say it. but today, wow. i must say, she was highly impressive and it was really something that i was shocked by. When she presented her parts of the AGM, it was like she had no problems whatsoever. :) was really proud of her for that and I hope that the Lord will give her more opportunities to share and conduct public speaking. :) Good on you girl! knew u could do it.

Yarh, then after that, we had exco meeting and it was pretty hard to get our brains back on track coz we were all quite tired. :) but we managed to finish that and now i'm back home on a lazy saturday afternoon blogging and camming. :) Just had a bowl of Pulot Hitam Island Creamery ice cream... mmmm heaven in a bowl.. or close to it. haha

And now, i've got nothing planned up for today. yayz. hahah kinda tired but obviously i'll stay online to chat and stuff. :) haiz. tomolo might pop by army camp... see how. :)

Tired Fingers, thick hair

You know your hair is getting long and thick when your fingers start aching from the volume while shampoo-ing your hair.

tired fingers... but ah, i love the smell of my conditioner... mmm herbal essence orange flavour... mmmmm niceeeee.

it's in a bad stage now though. not short, not long.... faster grow faster!!! and this time, i'm not going to let some hair dresser ruin it again. :)

p.s. visa's confirmed. nothing stands in the way between me and my future studies. :) yayz.
37 days to go.

TOTALLY RANDOM POST

Ok so this post is going to be totally random... like the things that pop into my head would be translated to words. dun worry, i'll try not to let this be too long.

fish in the supermarket today weren't fresh. my balcony's kinda dirty coz everytime i step out to open the door, i take as little steps as possible. sky's pretty cloudy today, hope it doesn't rain. oh i'm going dancing today, 3 hours worth; hope i dun die. Hmmm maybe i should change my sms ringtone, getting stale. Bought bread today that was fluffy and nice. my floor fan's kinda cute, it moves when the wind blows but it's not on. ugly bobble head dolls on my table scare me. staring is a hobby, so sue me i like it. why do i have a torchlight on my desk when it doesn't work.

visa's taking too long to process, getting worried. signed up for unlimited dance classes today! woo! applied for overseas trip notifcation with the SAF, still need to call my unit to confirm it. i'm taking too long to read eclipse, keep getting distracted. sms just came thru, let me read. i love driving, and i'm going to miss it.

talking bout miss, i'll miss people, surely. But time and distance won't separate us i guess. effort, it's all about initiative and effort. hearing a person's voice is so much better than reading text. random blog posts are SO nonsensical but fun to do from time to time.

-fin-

40 Days

So i had dinner today with M.Seah, M.Ho and L.Kwan... the Melb people... wow. it was fun coz finally everyone could meet everyone and things would slowly feel like it's actually happening... i guess when i went to do the visas and the medical check ups and the applications, it still didn't really sink in yet... and i guess it still hasn't sunk in titanic style yet.. but i guess my departure, as quickly as it approaches, is heralding its date by feelings of excitement.

Today during dinner, just talkin bout the food we'll be eating there, the places we'll be going to, the stuff we'll be studying... it was jus so cool. We brought the baked rice to the poolside and there was a nice breeze there... jus the 4 of us... the 2 Uni of Melb guys and the 2 RMIT girls... and i was thinking, it's going to be like this over there... sittin there having a meal... all of us.. jus chilling and enjoying each other's company. :)

Guess there are lots of things that could change and people to meet... i had a fren who was scaring me today by saying stupid stuff like how i'll go there and meet new people or get too busy with my life that i'll find some other fren to talk to and some other person to spend time with... and that my fren now would be replaced... haiz. stupid fren. u know who u are i'm sure...
I dun deny that things will be different and yes i'll be busy... we might not chat or talk as much as we do now coz of the change in environment and all. but my frens are always frens and if u were special to me once, u'll always be special to me.... stupid worries i guess. but i pray that God will allow me to keep in touch with people coz i'd hate to drift from people... it's natural i suppose, out of sight, out of mind.

yup... so as the date draws nearer, i pray God will prepare me and remind me that i'm not going alone.. but with Him, and He's more than enough for me. :)

To Bella

Inspired by Twilight. Dun read coz it prob contains spoilers.

To Bella...

And so Edward said to Bella, 4 hours sounds like a very long time to wait for you. But Edward knew in his head that that 4 hours would be as long to him as it was going to be to her.
He sniffed and strained to smell the air. Alas, it's still as stale as it is. Knowing he hadn't much time, especially tonite, to continue on his conversations with Bella, he tried to redeem whatever time he had left with her.

He said, Bella, I may not always know how to react to you and sometimes i can't. But know that you are my life now and my world is slowly but surely revolving around you. I find you very fascinating and interesting. I could watch you all day and still not know what goes on in your head. I wish i could read your thots and feel your heart. Bella, i'll stay with you till u sleep and make sure that nothing ever harms you. When you're with me, my world feels that much more complete and even though i'm so much older than you, when we talk, i feel like the age isn't an issue at all. If i had my way, i'd spend eternity looking at you.

And so the lion fell in love with the lamb.
What a stupid lamb
What a sick, masochistic lion

Lord I offer my life to You

Today during service, this song really spoke to me and made me rethink on alot of things in my life. Recently J.Lim came up to me and reminded me [thanks ah chao ah lian] that it not only is my 6th year serving in the YF Exco.... but she was asking me whether i ever get tired of serving and stuff... but i told her that every year is different and every year has different people too so it's not like 6 years but 6 different years of different service. That in itself is enuf to motivate me to another year of service but Regardless of all said and done, only God has brought us all thru... the YF has really grown and changed over these years and I thank God only for that. :)

However, today during the service, this song spoke to me about how we should be serving God with our lives. what do we have that is not already His... that reminded me never to horde whatever we have because ultimately, what are we grasping onto so tightly? It belonged to the Lord and we should use it for His glory. :)
Also, I pray that as we serve God, we avail ourselves to serve God.

Oh no, michelle is scolding me for blogging now. hahaha ok so here, hope u're edified by the song.

Lord, I Offer My Life to You
Verse 1:
All that I am, all that I have
I lay them down before You O Lord
All my regrets, all my acclaim
The joy and the pain, I'm making them Yours

CHORUS:
Lord I offer my life to You
Everything I've been through
Use it for Your glory
Lord I offer my days to You
Lifting my praise to You
As a pleasing sacrifice
Lord I offer You my life

Verse 2:
Things in the past, things yet unseen
Wishes and dreams that are yet to come true
All of my hopes, all of my plans
My heart and my hands are lifted to You

Happy New Year!

Yo yo... it's 2009!!! 4.34am of the first day of this new year. wow. 2009. the last time we can write 1 digit as the year! soon it'll be 2010 and things would have been so different.

As i think back on 2008, the things that brought me joy and pain, laughter and tears... i remember that God was with me all the way and thru it all, He's never given up on me. I think it's during times like this where i sit back and wonder to myself how God, the creator of the world and my heavenly father, can bother with someone like me. I've sinned much and lost sight of Him so many times... and yet He still forgives and loves me for all my flaws.

And that's sumthing that rang true to me in 2008. When i left the army, i thot it'd be tough to get back to reality and stuff but i guess God provided and gave me what i needed to pull thru to 2009. And as i sit here in the chapel, with youths all around sleeping coz it's the new year's stay over, i thank God for giving me frens around who remind me of His love and grace. The service reminded me never to think of my struggles and issues as too big for God and to always look for chances that i can encourage people or help them thru a struggle in their lives. :) At times i wonder to myself how much i'll miss this warm community of believers and how much of this will be taken from me in a few months time. :) but i guess that's why God puts them here in your life, so u'll treasure them and cherish the time u have on this earth. :)

Yup. so a blessed 2009 to everyone and may God be merciful, gracious and blessed on all you. :)

poopoohead sucks

u suck for not answering my qn properly
u suck for saying maybe
and most imptly u suck coz u're such a poopoohead.
ewww that stinks.

Post Christmas Updates

So sorry i haven't been updating. Been a bit busy and my lappy died. Blogging wasn't really one of the things that were on my top priority. :) But i JUST got it fixed. the dude who came to fix it, left my house not too long ago. Thank God that it 'spoilt' before i went to Aust... otherwise that might have been a bit distressing. :)

Today i went shopping with some of the youths... it was quite a fun time jus going out and not really having much of an agenda for the rest of the day. [other than coming home by 3 to wait for Dell's technician]... but yeh. i had a really good experience that day. After all the normal meetings and lunch on sunday, i plonked my little butt down at whitesands Mac Cafe with my Zen and "New Moon"... that's the 2nd series of the Twilight Series. wow can. it was SO shiok. i just sat there with my book, zen and a tall Caramel Frapp... it was like heaven. Ended up reading like 1/3 of the book in the 2 and a half hours sitting there... once more, it was jus WONDERFUL sitting there reading and reading and not having to worry bout rushing off to sumwhere. i need more time alone like that. Chien Chong reminded me during YF on saturday that u can be alone and not be lonely. That's what we should strive for, at least for me, to not be lonely when i'm alone. Coz some people can be [like the Buble 'home' song says] surrounded by a million people, and still feel so lonely. :S Chien Chong shared with us about some church person who committed suicide even though she was serving and coming to church regularly. So scary to think who might be like that. who's suffering silently and just not taking their life yet... who? what about me? am i watching my spiritual and mental health too? neglect oneself and u'll end up worse off. :S

Christmas this year wasn't the best thing that happened to me in Dec. I dun wanna go into detail but i guess it reminded me that i can't keep wasting my life away on people or things that shouldn't be such a high priority in my life. I was talking to Ju and i was telling her that when u give and give until u've got nothing left to give and then u dun get anything in return or whatever, it gets very hard... but actually, u still give coz u dun give to get, u give so that the Lord gets. Tough man. really... esp when u give and u give and not only does it not get returned to you, but it's spat in your face or given to someone else. that's when it hurts. but why should my individual mortal hurt be compared to what pain God feels when we reject or neglect Him. So yeh... just a thot in my mind this Christmas too. If your reason for the season [or your life] is other people then when it doesn't turn out the way u planned, u crumble. But if ur reason is God... then even if it goes totally against what u planned, u'll be safely securely grounded in God.

Another thing Leonard said during sermon on sunday struck me. Religion doesn't get us to Heaven, Faith in Jesus Christ does.

As u can see i'm throwing out a lot of Random stuff that keeps popping in my head. But i'm glad to have a little time to myself today to just think and pour out some stuff in this blog. :)

Oh about that, my flight has been settled and cofnirmed. And I'm flying on the same flight as L.Kwan. Wonderful coz it was fully booked out and it looked like i was going to fly later... but God opened the window and i literally jumped thru it. Thank God for giving me so many things. He's really preparing me and paving my way to Melb. :)

I thank God for blessing me with friends and family during this christmas period coz i thot it was going to be a lonely one... remember, i said lonely, not a christmas spent alone... but i guess apart from some bad stuff that happened [which i'm putting past me] Christ has reminded me that He provides His love to me thru frens. And some of the most unlikely sources... from a certain young fren who keeps me happy all the time. MSN is really amazing i tell u. it bridges distance and makes u feel like u're just next to someone when u chat with them. I thank God for friends like poopoohead who keeps me happy and smiley even thruout the day. Yes, we may not be very similar in tons of ways.. but i think it's when u look past those things and jus chill and spend time cultivating a relationship with someone that u find joy and i really do enjoy the times we share on msn. it's like last nite... we chatted till 3am! hahah and then i woke at 7 to send R.yeo off at the airport. haha. :) Yup. so thanks for being special... u totally know u are... as am i. mwahhaa. :)

Blessed Christmas Every One! New Year's coming soon!

Youth Camp 2008

It's been a long time that I've blogged. goodness. But i guess it's also coz these 2 weeks have been mad for me. Youth Camp and Leader's Retreat have been taking up my time. Even now, i'm in leader's retreat. Taking some time off my sleep to jus update this coz there's been quite a lot of things that have happened that i don't wanna forget about.

I really do treasure the times i just go through my blog or my journals and all and see the past. what i wrote and how i felt at that point in time. it does remind me of what God was teaching me during that point in my life. :) so that's why i dun wanna forget to blog about youth camp and lr so far. :)

Youth Camp came and went and it felt like the longest camps in church that i've had in a long time. i guess i've been super looking forward to this one too coz it's prob my last and it's been a while since i've been able to attend youth camp proper. There was 3 years of poly and 2 years of army that really got in the way of youth camps. :) so this year was not only a time that I was in the camp comm but also a full time camper. What i realized half way thru the camp though was that I was the oldest camper there. so scary. but so blessed too. You know how they say that u should return to the next generation what u got from the generation above you? Well it's really true and it's honestly really blessed to see the younger generation stepping up to serve and lead. It's 100%-ly encouraging to see them just take over and take charge. I thank God that His work in Shalom is still going strong and i pray that He will never give up on them and likewise, they will seek Him first in all their ways, church or not.

Camp comm was something that i was glad to be in this year. Each one really did shine for Him not only in this camp but in every meeting. Nick, Debbie, Qiang, Julia, Joella, Arthur, Sherwin, Shannon. People who work together and pray together will ultimately see God work in the midst of them and be we are so thankful for so many instances where God showed us His fingerprints in our plans and in our execution. Thank God also for WONDERFUL weather that He blessed us with. So many times, we take for granted such a simple aspect of God's goodness...
My group was SO fun. :) we really made ourselves a little crazy for each other la. A lot of it was initiative and shamelessness. :) 22 years old but i felt that if i didn't do a lot of things first, the younger ones wouldn't. :) so my strategy to make CHARITY the most enthu group and most crazy fun group was to be the first to be crazy and fun. if no one's willing to be that, then the group would never have fun. :)

We had a great monitoress too la. chelsea was quite a roit and she truly kept the group alive with the "C is for..." song. :) yayz. ahhah. And i must commend her on her taking charge of the group too. :) i know it's not too easy to take leadership like that when there's not much preperation and things to do. but chelsea really did a fantabulous job at it. :) so i'm also quite proud of her. :) YAY! C IS FOR CHELSEA!!!!

Angel Mortal board was FUN FUN FUN. I was really glad that we did the board this year. It was real fun to encourage people and get to know more and more people thru the board. My angel rawked too. Gave me stuff like nice little 'mysterious' notes and MEI JI CRACKERS!!! haha. yayz. :) but yeh, it wasn't too hard to guess who my angel was la. as much as the handwriting was SUPPOSED to be changed, i guess i know the person and the way she writes to be fooled la. mwhehe. :) yeh. so thanks for everyone who wrote notes and all :) it was really something that i'll keep with me for a long time. A day before camp, i actually took out some of the old notes that i have kept. And i found quite a few angel mortal letters from like 2 years ago... camps that have come and gone. :) so surely, i'll look back on these notes i just got and smile even in years to come. :)

Yup, so i learnt much about how to be an example in this camp.Elder's talks were good and the workshops were also very interesting. :) I pray that the youth will learn that God is not only their God but also their friend and saviour. :)

1 Timothy 4:12
Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.
Be An Example. YF Camp 2008

Starbucks day!

I'm TOTALLY there... totally.

A peek at 25th Nov

So J.Chen gave me this idea last time about leaving the blogger [for my case, email box] open the whole day and from time to time, jus come here and blog. so let's give it a shot. You are about the view a simple working day in my life.

9.47am.
Well it's not like i just walked in... but it's when i decided to try out this blog by time kinda thing... i'm here cutting post it notes coz i found like 7 boxes of uncut ones and i end work this friday so it's getting a bit stressful. ahha Z says jus try your best, not like it's that impt anyways... so good good. Xiu smsed this morn saying she won't be lunching and Cal's also not joining coz she's got an interview. So i think it looks like it's jus Phil and me. Looking forward to thurs when the whole gang [hopefully] would be lunching again. Yup. Kinda quiet in the office now. Z went for breakfast and i'm jus cutting post its.
Thoughts are flying to last nite and the chat i had with a fren. it's nice to know that things are all well and fine. Guess it gives me motivation to get online esp recently when there's not much to go online for. mmm. back to post its...
note to self, rhyme more... you need the practice. :)

11.08am.
Deciding where to go for lunch. today seems to be jus phil and i. so we're thinking of either cine or singtel. :) benefits for both i guess. hahaha. Just called up my IDP agent to clarify some course fees issue before i sign on the dotted line and apply for visa. :) it's actually happening. so cool. i'm looking forward to going really i am. but shhh k? haha... Currently i'm quite smitten with Taylor Swift's songs... they're real nice and the words are quite cool too. it's for the drop dead romantic la. so if you're not the sweet kind, u might not like it. I love "Our Song" "teardrops on my guitar" and "picture to burn" :) yuppers... work's pretty ok today. jus cutting post its. :)
just a glimpse into my emotional/mental state now. i'm kinda torn as to what to do. I have the part of me that says stuff should be resolved and i shouldn't be acting the way i am. But then i dun think it'll make a difference and it might make things worse... so it's either burn bridges or jus suffer in silence. mmm not sure. :)

1.27pm
lunch was good. bad coz i wanted chicken drumstick rice and there wasn't drumstick so it was jus normal chicken. but hey, who really cares bout the food la. :) Phil's great company. u can jus have lunch and he'll jus talk and entertain the whole way. :) all i need to do is laugh along and listen. haha. Guess i did stone for a bit coz he thot i was a bit stoic today. maybe i am, or maybe i'm jus stoning. not sure but i have a relaxed mind today. not willing to push it further than it needs to be to function. Or maybe i'm jus deep in stoning thot. Z jus messaged to say she won't be in the office till 3 coz she's at lunch. And i'm going to Taka later at 3 coz i need to go collect some stuff at the dry cleaners. So that means i have till 3 to slack/cut post its. Then at 3, i'll go to taka till bout 3.40? Come back and cut more... 4pm. Then it's jus another 2 hours till i'm off today. This week is DRAGGY. i thot today was wednesday lor. was making lunch plans for tomolo then i realized it's only tues. gahhhh. :) Anyhoo, i've thot about what it'll be like when i'm no longer in spore. So diff... no more chicken rice, hokkien mee, nasi lemak and prata easily accessible. The horror!!! but Phil says i'll get used to it. how true. Sigh. i guess i'll have to get used to not having a lot of things i have now. food, friends... mmm i'll make do. i've got my killiney ice coffee with me. Hope i dun feel sleepy today. This blog by timing is coming along quite cool. :) Super long entry i'm forseeing.

2.41pm
I'm pretty happy with the way my hair is falling today. Changed parting last nite so was expecting it to take a few days to get used to it... and the way it's falling now is much better than i expected it to. so i'm quite pleased. no huge change but it's a small change to make sure that when it gets longer [gawsh it's taking FOREVER] it'll fall the way i want it to. :) whee. random thot. thanks xiu.

3.40pm
Joel wonders to himself how he messed up so greatly. And he wishes he could go back to where we were a few years ago. He knows he's messed up too much to even have that. And thus he's sad. boo hoo. totally. haha

5.39pm
Just came back from Taka. Went to go collect some stuff that were pretty overdue. HAHA. :) who cares la. they keep it, i'll go collect it. I came back in a super good mood. dunno why. maybe it's jus getting out of the office for a short while that changes everything. Or maybe it's the fact that i'm meeting A.Yeo for dinner and catching up. Really treasure this BROTHER coz he's always been someone i've kept closer than a brother. And i'm glad that we're still really good coz i'd hate to lose a frenship/brother like him. Anyhoo, after that i plan on getting donuts and popping by to church to surprise the counsellors with nice yummy sweet treats. yayz! totally happy. hahaha. oki. back to cutting post its. work's ending soon. another reason to be happy. S.Soon came to my desk jus now and she was like JOELLLLL u've got 3 more days left!!! ahhh!!!! And i was like wah, you're counting down for me ah? ahah :)

5.54pm
Time to wrap it up. this has been an immensely interesting and fun way to blog. sorry it's so long but i must say that random thots the pop into my head pop out so quickly unless u blog it down. Today has been a good day. Frens talking over MSN and Emails... going to Taka and having long breaks in the office where it's jus me, the post it notes and my laptop [Taylor Swift serenading] :) and yet, the day is but half done. i'm so glad hahah whee! what a good day so far.

Till tomolo! [Might do this again since this is immensely fun] Ciaoz people and God Bless. remember, He will never leave you nor forsake you and He's holding your hand.

Regards,
Joel Tan
Brand Experience

Last week @ SingTel

So this is the last week that i'll be working at singtel and prob working at all before i continue studying. It's kinda weird to think that it's ending. I've only been at SingTel for bout 4+ months... But i've seen so many people come and go.

Inez, Sophia, Jason, Guansin, Sarah, Nathania, Aaron, Calista....

I've got so many farewell cards from each of them that I feel like a perm staff here. Haha. But i guess it's good too coz i've experienced F1 through and through. From the planning, to the actual event and now the post evaluation. :) it's been useful to say the least. Being in a department that I've never worked in before or have any experience in... It's been much more than an eye opener. :) My bosses and superiors have all been nice people. Save for a few occassions that have gotten me down by their demands or whatever, it's all good coz it's part and parcel of life or of work... It's also a learning lesson to manage and deal with your boss...

I'm glad for the people God has placed me with in this working life too. I've always been one who dreaded eating alone when i work. I was a temp staff at some insurance agency before doing paper work data entry... And i lunched alone every day there for about 4 months too. It was a horrible feeling coz it's like lunches jus mean putting food into my body and listening to my Zen... It wasn't even in a convenient place so there was little variety too... Gosh i remember those days... Not fun. :) But in SingTel, i've NEVER eaten alone. Can u believe that? :) It's either with other interns, bosses, colleagues or with frens from other companies... My lunch company these few recent months have been the highlight of my work days sometimes. It's a bunch of peers that are from everywhere around the somerset region. Cal and Xiu are from Dhoby Gaut and Phil's from Clarke Quay... But we meet for lunch every day without fail and I have to say that many times, they're also the reason why i come to work everyday not dreading it. :) Emails from them also help to make the work day SO much better. :) I'm just thankful for the friends that God places in my life, however unexpectedly. :)

Yup, so as i close this week, i pack my things with bittersweet feelings. To know that i made a difference here and to the people whom i've interacted with this 4 months, i hope i made a positive impact. It's interesting to know how each phase of your life ends and another begins... This is literal for me now. And whee! Can't wait for december... :)

SingTel, always bringing you the best.

Regards,
Joel Tan
Brand Experience

Cooler Heads Devotional

November 18, 2008

Cooler Heads

A man of understanding is of a calm spirit. —Proverbs 17:27

A Christian I know was angry with someone at his workplace over a perceived injustice. A colleague listened to his grievance and sensed that his temper still ran high. He gave him this wise advice to consider before confronting those involved: “Cooler heads prevail.”

As we interact with others, disagreements are inevitable. The discerning believer understands his own heart and takes steps to deal with conflict diplomatically.

Proverbs 17:27 tells us: “He who has knowledge spares his words.” This means keeping in check a multitude of opinions that could ignite further anger in others. Someone who displays wisdom will think before speaking, and then will share only insights likely to be helpful.

The Proverbs also give us wise counsel on the emotional side of controlling our frustrations. “A man of understanding is of a calm spirit.” A mature person exhibits understanding by keeping cool in conflict. Problem-solving is enhanced by an even-tempered approach.

The next time you become angry, stop and prayerfully reflect for a moment. Ask God for a calm spirit and the right words to say.

Remember, cooler heads prevail. —Dennis Fisher

The best time to stop an argument is before it starts.

Mummy's better

Yay, Praise God... Mum's back home and resting [kinda. Still running around although we tell her not to] Really thank God that the operation was good and now is the recovery stage. It was good that the infection wasn't serious and rectify-able... Coz it could have been MUCH worse.. And as always, i won't go into gory gross details about how the eye can be infected. Let's jus say it's an impt asset we all don't wanna lose. We so often take for granted such things like sight, hearing, voice... Those sorta thing... But thank God that He reminds us with stuff like this. We must always ask ourselves how God can get glory out of this and what can we learn about Him thru all situations.

Whether it be the fear of losing your sight or someone u love or to the simple every day issues of bitterness and the struggle of people relations... God always has a plan and a purpose for everything. It's just whether we want to go around walllowing in self pity/bitterness/blame-game or do we want to be mature spiritual people and seek God in it.

It's scary to think that we don't have control over so many things.. But i guess that's the beauty of it all no? That God's in control and when we think we steer our life, God rebukes us by takin over and showing us how helpless we all can be. :) You may think you have your life planned out, u know where you'll be in the next 2 years, 5 years maybe even 10 years.. Then everything can change overnight coz of sumthing that happens... Reminds me of like ants running along a long line towards the nest... Then on comes this human who puts an obstacle in the middle of the chain of ants... Routine, structure, organization is suddenly thrown in mass hysteria. But only for a while. Then the ants find another way and the chain just goes around the obstacle. Circumventing a problem... Ants. Just like us... But the difference is that the person who puts this 'so-called-obstacle' has our good in mind... And how often we think we know better. :)

I end work here at singtel in 2 weeks. My 4 month stint is coming to an end. Bittersweet feelings as always to leave. Don't know what's lying ahead of me and yet still happy to get some break from the drudgery of coming to work everyday. But i shall have to commit myself to certain self-improvement things when i'm free-er. Skills and training i guess...

Yup... Thank God for many things in my life too that are well, helping me to see God in the daily.

Regards,
Joel Tan
Brand Experience

Eye Operation

Mummy jus got wheeled into the Eye Operation... praying hard that nothing will go wrong, everything will be done painlessly and that she's get back her sight proper. :) Scared but God is in control.

I;m sitting here in the hospital ward waiting for her to come back. I've no "eye-deer" what time she's coming back and all and i must say it's scary. but i guess there's no way u can truly learn dependency on God if you've never really felt helpless. which is exactly what i feel now. :S

pray for her oki?

Shalom YF Camp 2008 Publicity

Dinner and Dempsey IceCream

So two nights ago, i managed to have the priviledge of taking a good fren out for dinner. It's been a while since we've been able to talk proper and catch up over a meal so it was surely the highlight of my week... And it didn't disappoint at all. As it always doesn't, the whole day was filled with happiness and surprises. Managed to get off work on the dot [like the past few days thankfully] and chionged home for the car. I'm glad i did coz there's no way i'd have gone to dempsey without a car. Trust me...

Girls, if u have a bf who can't drive, you're TOTALLY missing out on dempsey. And guys if u can drive, GO TO DEMPSEY at least once... It's a nice place... Jus dun go alone with a girl lest she get the wrong idea... Hahaha

Yeh so we had a simple not-so-cheap-but-i-thot-it-would-be dinner at a hawker centre. Which was great coz i realized that when i meet frens out for dinner, it's hardly ever hawker food... It's like a mental image i have to break... Why can't people still catch up over hawker food? Why must it be pasta mania or cafe cartel or fish n co... U get my drift... So yeh, the food was so-so but that's not impt rite? :) glad that i managed to get an update from my fren who was kind enuf to keep making sure that i wouldn't stray too far away from each other to stay accountable. :) And likewise, i updated my side of things [not much coz i live a boring life]... It's good to hear how people struggle thru things coz it shows their vulnerable side and when u see that, u know they trust u enuf to tell u certain things. It also helps u open up to share. And that's what a brother/sister in Christ is all about rite? Sharing in the body of Christ and working thru problems with the help of each other and God. God speaks thru individuals too and affirmations or rebuke can also come from these close frens u have. :) That's why it's always better to hear another's opinion rather than yourself.

Sharing pain is akin to sharing joys too and i'm glad that we were able to rejoice over a certain issue that my fren's facing... It's a good thing and we're just glad that God is opening up doors and yet still helping things remain in control and progressing ever so slightly. :) Just pray that we'll all keep close to God and that it'll all work together for good.

After dinner [which i felt was rushed coz of parking and also coz we had destination2 to go to], we drove by to pick up my fren's mother and sister and drove down to dempsey for ice cream... Ben and jerry's... What a way to enjoy life no? :) so it was a good time to fellowship over ice cream... And live band! What a double treat! Glad that we were all able to talk and enjoy each other's company. I will really seriously miss this kind of close fellowship when i leave... It's why i'm initiating such now... Coz i'm jus afraid that i'll have no time for it later and then when i fly, i'm gonna so regret. :) My fren's close to my heart and so is my fren's mother... It's something i dun wanna lose when i fly... So i'm glad that it was all possible. :)

But of course it's not so much about where we all went and what we ate that makes me want to record this post down. It's the fact that when i'm overseas and looking back, i'm gonna smile remembering that in spore, there are people i care bout and i want to remember never to stop being accountable even miles away... Coz it's when you're miles away that u need it the most.

Praise the Lord for friends and family.

Regards,
Joel Tan
Brand Experience

RollerCoasters

I guess i'm going through a state of mind now that's not very healthy. Things are pulling me up and down and up and down. It really feels like sometimes, i'm just riding a roller coaster and i never know when it's gonna shoot up to the heavens in an estatic state of joy or gladness or dip down low in states of personal disappointment or fear of what's to come. I wonder to myself sometimes whether this is all part of life. I wish to myself sometimes that emotions, feelings, moods and thoughts would jus be plain, simple and routine. Then I think how boring life would be without all these things.

But that's not impt coz we are all on the ride of life and it's whether we choose to enjoy it or not... Aint it? :)
Glad that a lot of decisions in my life has been settled in the past few days. Gives me a sense of comfort as to what's going to happen to me in a few days/weeks/months time... And i am really looking forward to the future now i guess. :) so different, so new, so exciting.

It sucks to see friends fight... Esp when they're all Christian. Like some movie character said... Why can't we all just .... get along?

People change, feelings change [that's a song btw] and i believe it to be very true. When i look back on myself a few years ago [yes, i was thrown into this state becoz i recently dug out some real old photos of me... You'll see them on facebook soon. Lolz, let me upload them]... I am amazed at some decisions i made and some friends i had. Not bad in influence. But more of where they are now. Lots of my sec sch frens are all living their own lives and i barely keep in touch with them. Thankfully there are still a few people who i regularly contact and have helped me along the way... Thanks matt. :)  And some friends i made then, those i was close to.. I look at them now... And i barely even know them. The choices they make, the people they keep, the lives they live. And i wonder to myself... If they can change so much, if what they said last time do not linger true now... Have i changed that much too? It pains my heart sometimes to see these friends becoz more often than not, i choose not to try to get to know them anymore. It's like there's no point banging on a closed door... So i just pray that God would watch over them and keep them in the Way [and no NISS class, i'm not talkin bout the jewish way. Lolz]

But then i look at the present and the future and i see so many potential people coming up and into my life that it's jus excitingly fresh. I saw potential in someone on Sunday that really made me think to myself whether my life should be about me and my plans. Or shouldn't it be to devote myself into people who can be guided towards spiritual maturity? Scary thot but i was likening it to how I was moulded by someone whom i respect so much... And i wonder whether or not it'll be even able to be someone like him, to someone else.... It's wonderful to think. :) mentorship is lacking in my church but what am i doing about it? Sitting and complaining? :)

Yeh, so that's just my thoughts at the start of Tuesday. Mid week [k fine, not really but let me lie to myself ok!!! Lolz]... I'm glad i have an outlet. Not a completely good way coz it's still a public outlet. But at least sumthing i can air my thoughts on. Have a blessed week.

By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another. John 13:35

Regards,
Joel Tan
Brand Experience